I was taught a long time ago that what you say, how you say it and to whom you speak it can play a significant role in the peace, joy, success and harmony that you create in your life. It is for this reason, I believe, that the book of James has a whole chapter on taming the tongue.
When we put bits in the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. James 3:3
Consider the way you answered the question, "How are you?" the last time it was asked of you. Most of us are not truthful in the response, primarily because we know the one asking the questions really isn't concerned about how we are. We know they are just using that as an unconscious introductory phrase. The challenge in this is that the words we speak have meaning to our subconscious mind and spirit and have a tremendous impact on the outcomes of our lives.
When we become conscious communicators, that is, consciously observing the words we choose in conversations with others and ourselves, we can impact the course of our lives.
The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. Proverbs 18:21
Choosing to use common phrases such as "My back is killing me" or "That just makes me sick" impacts the activity in the psychosomatic workings of the brain (consciously or non-consciously) which in turn plays out in our daily lives.
The verse from James talks about being able to turn the whole horse by controlling the mouth. We are not any different. If we can learn to control our mouths, especially the words that come from it, we can change our life. The words we choose, as you we know, can either be constructive in the world, or destructive. Just the same, the words we use when talking to or with ourselves, have the same constructive or destructive value. This is why calling yourself a dummy or stupid, or saying things like "I could never do that" only reinforces your current false beliefs. Scripture says that faith comes from hearing the word and this is not only valid for faith in Christ Jesus, but other areas of life as well.
If we continually are told how ugly, or stupid, or slow, or incompetent we are, over time, that builds faith in the fact that it must be true. The same is true for the other end of the perspective as well. The more we hear how sweet, or smart, or beautiful we are, the more we tend to believe it.
The words you think and speak are as powerful as the elevators on the tail of a 747 jet. One slight change in a positive or negative direction will either lift the jet up or cause it drop. Take some time today to contemplate the words you use. Watch what happens around you when you decide to lift yourself and others up with your words, rather than beat you and them down.